A wife, one evening, drew her husband's attention to the couple next door and said, "Do you see that couple? How devoted they are? He kisses her every time they meet. Why don't you do that?"

"I would love to." Replied the husband. "But I don't know her well enough."

From his death bed, the husband called his wife and said, "One month after I die I want you to marry Samy."

"Samy! But he is your enemy !" "Yes, I know that ! I've suffered all these years so let him suffer now."

During Marriage ceremony why is the bridegroom made to sit on the horse?

He is given his last chance to run away.

Husband says; "When I'm gone you'll never find another man like me".

Wife replied; "What makes you think I'd want another man like you!"

Two friends, who hadn't seen each other in several years, met on the street.

"Who are you working for now?" asked the first.

"Same people," answered the other. "My wife and four children."

First Soldier: "What made U go into the army?"

Second Soldier: "I had no wife and I loved war. What about you?"

First Soldier: "Well, I had a wife and loved peace."

A person who surrenders when he's WRONG, is HONEST.

A person who surrenders when not SURE, is WISE.

A person who surrenders even if he's RIGHT, is a HUSBAND!

What is the difference between a husband and a magnet? Magnets have a positive side!

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. -Milton Berle

People say there is no difference between COMPLETE & FINISH.... But there is!

When you marry the right one, you are COMPLETE.....

And when you marry the wrong one, you are FINISHED.....

And when the "right one" catches you with the "wrong one", You are ..... COMPLETELY FINISHED

Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life Thinking they had no faults at all.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage.

They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

Every Wife is a "Mistress" for her Husband. "Miss" for one hour & "Stress" for the rest 23 hours!

The are 2 times when a Man doesn't understand a Woman. Before Marriage and After Marriage.

My Husband And I Divorced Over Religious Differences. He Thought He Was God, and I Didn't.

Husband Searching Keywords on Google` How to Tackle Wife? Google Search Result, "Still Searching`.

A Man Goes To A Shrink And Says, "Doctor, My Wife Is Unfaithful To Me. Every Evening, She Goes To Larry's Bar And Picks Up Men. In Fact, She Sleeps With Anybody Who Asks Her! I'm Going Crazy. What Do You Think I Should Do?" "Relax," Says The Doctor, "Take A Deep Breath And Calm Down. Now, Tell Me, Exactly Where Is Larry's Bar?"

Husband Throwing Darts at His Wife's Photo and Not Even a Single One Hitting the Target... From Another Room Wife Called The Husband: Honey What Are You Doing...Husband: "MISSING YOU"...

*Laughter Therapy* While getting married, most of the guys say to girl's parents, "I will keep your daughter happy for the rest of her life" Have you ever heard a girl saying something like this to the boy's parents ?????? like "I will keep your son happy for the rest of his life" Nooo.... because women don't tell lies -x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x- A small argument between a couple turns violent. Husband says: Don’t let the animal in me come out. Wife replies: Who’s afraid of a mouse!!! -x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x- If wife wants husband’s attention, she just has to look sad and uncomfortable. If husband wants wife’s attention, he just has to look comfortable & happy. -x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x- A Philosopher HUSBAND said:- Every WIFE is a ‘Mistress’ of her Husband… “Miss” for first year & “Stress” for rest of the life… -x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x- Do you remember the tingling feeling when you took the decision to get married? That was common sense leaving your body. -x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x- Son : Dad, l got selected for a role in a play for annual day! Dad: What role are you playing? Son: A husband! Dad: Stupid, ask for a role with dialogues! -x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x- Man outside phone booth: “Excuse me you are holding phone since 29 minutes and you haven’t spoken a word”. Man inside: “i am talking to my wife” -x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x- A very intelligent girl was asked the meaning of marriage.. She said- “sacrificing the admiration of hundred guys, to face the criticism of one idiot” -x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x Position of a husband is just like a Split AC, No matter how loud he is outdoor, He is designed to remain silent indoor! -x-x-x-x-x-x-x- Husband to wife : U should learn to embrace your mistakes….. She hugged him immediately. ..…

A newly married couple was walking through a garden, suddenly a dog ran towards them. They both knew it will bite them.. The husband lifted his wife and let the dog bite him rather than his sweetheart The dog stopped before them, unsure what to do, barked a little while and ran away. The husband put his wife down, expecting a hug and a few kind words of gratitude from her. But his wife shouted "I have seen people throwing stones and sticks at dogs, this is the first time I am seeing someone trying to throw his wife at a dog"!! Husband... Moral : A Wife is a Wife No One ELSE Can MIS-UNDERSTAND a Husband Better, than a Wife. Swami Unknownananda