SUPERB_ Definitions *_Wonderfully described definitions......._* *CIGARETTE:* A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other! *MARRIAGE:* It's an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master *LECTURE:* An art of transmitting Information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of students without passing through the minds of either *CONFERENCE:* The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present *COMPROMISE:* The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece *TEARS:* The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine water-power! *DICTIONARY:* A place where divorce comes before marriage *CONFERENCE ROOM:* A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on *CLASSIC:* A book which people praise, but never read *SMILE:* A curve that can set a lot of things straight! *OFFICE:* A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life *ETC:* A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do *COMMITTEE:* Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together *EXPERIENCE:* The name men give to their Mistakes *ATOM BOMB:* An invention to bring an end to all inventions *DIPLOMAT:* A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip *OPPORTUNIST:* A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river *MISER:* A person who lives poor so that he can die RICH! *FATHER:* A banker provided by nature *CRIMINAL:* A guy no different from the other, unless he gets caught *BOSS:* Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early *POLITICIAN:* One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence Later *DOCTOR:* A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by his bills!